I am going through the devotional book by David Nasser, "A Call To Die", and 40 day journey of dying to one's self. If you have kept up with any of these things, you'll probably have noticed that I said the same thing much longer than 40 days ago. I am not going through it daily. I don't know why, I'm just not. However, every time I open it, God speaks directly to my circumstances and life. It's like God WANTS me to open it and be amazed at how He speaks to me. Seriously. The last time I opened, I was reading about being hungry for God's Word, and being intentional about 'eating' it, as the prophet Jeremiah says. This time, here is what I read:
God's Curriculum
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance, perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." - James 1:2-4
I don't know about you, but when I was in school, I didn't exactly think tests in Algebra or Biology... were "pure joy." I hated tests. Is James nuts?... No, he had a much clearer perspective on the value of testing than I ever did when I was in school. He had God's perspective.
God's curriculum in the school of faith is much different from what most of us want. We look forward to recess; he wants to prepare us for a career in knowing and serving him. We long for easier days with no obstacles to overcome; he tests us to force us to learn crucial lessons. In his school, he knows exactly what we need, and he tailors the course to fit each of us uniquely. Sure, we have recess and we have times to hang out with our friends in th fellowship hall of life.But we also have labs where we are forced to apply what we've learned, or realize we haven't learned our lessons yet.
In his school, God's curriculum for you and me includes:
- enough joy to encourage us
- enough love to strengthen us
- enough success to build our confidence
- enough suffering to force us to depend on him
- enough confusion to make us seek his face
God's highest goal for you and me is not that we would enjoy school. His purpose is for us to enjoy him as he builds our faith. Not to bring success, but to build our faith. Not to make us happy, but to build our faith. Not to provide wonderful friends, but to build our faith. Not to make us comfortable, but to build our faith.
Get the picture? Most of us don't. We show how clueless we are when we whine and complain and quit when we don't get exactly what we want from God. Here's a news flash: God may have a different curriculum than we think he does.
... The prophet Isaiah recorded God's words of rebuke and assurance. He reminded the people that he is smarter than they are, and he assured them that his ways are always far better than anything they could imagine. Isaiah quoted God:
"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts" (Isaiah 55:8-9).
Difficulties, failure, rejection, and confusion are God's way of saying, "Hey, I'm over here! I've got something terrific to teach you. Pay attention."
God's usual method of instruction is to impart truth, followed with an affirmation like an answered prayer, and then test us to see if we really believe him. Just like school, the test comes after the classwork is done and the example are finished. Then we find out what we know and believe. Tests are not the same as temptations. A temptation has its source in the enemy of our souls, and its purpose is to cause us to fall. A test is given to us by God, and its purpose is to strengthen us. Actually, a single event can be both a test and a temptation, depending on how we respond.
People who have walked with God closely for a long time almost universally experience a particularly difficult type of test: darkness. Things are rocking along really well... God is rich and real and he is answering prayer... lives are changed and great things are happening. Then, nothing. A steel canopy is put over our heads and our prayers bounce off. It seems as though the spiritual phone lines are cut. We can't call out, and God doesn't call in. The modem won't connect. The light of God's presence, which we treasured so much the day before, has gone out. We feel the barrenness of being alone. Very alone.
I believe this, "dark night of the soul" is one of the most severe tests for those who are serious about walking with God. God doesn't give this test to young Christians. The darkness that immature believers experience has a different source, usually their sins.
When we fail t respond to the light of God's Spirit exposing our sins, we put a layer of doubt and disobedience over the light. If we continue to refuse to respond, those layers become opaque, and the light is effectively dimmed. The solution for this darkness is confession, repentance, and obedience. God usually responds to the one who repents by showering his love and light in fresh, strong ways.
The darkness mature believers endure is different. Very different. Those who suffer this darkness search their souls for sin. They plead with God to show them any obstruction (<- I was doing this last night),but they hear only silence. Deafening silence. Isaiah gave hope, perspective and warning to these people:
"Who among you fears the Lord and obeys the word of his servant? Let him who walks in the dark, who has no light, trusts in the name of the Lord and rely on his God. But now, all you who light fires and provide yourselves with flaming torches, go, walk in the light of your fires and the torches you have set ablaze. This is what you shall receive from my hand: You will lie down in torment" (Isaiah 50:10-11).
If you and I are committed to loving and serving Christ, sooner or later, we will enter a time of darkness. If we search and find no sin that is blocking God's light, we need to take heart from the prophet Isaiah and trust in the unchanging character of god. If we try to light our own flames by generating emotion and looking for new spiritual experiences, we will only hurt ourselves and feel tormented. Darkness is a severe test, and God reserves it for those who are ready. You may not be at that point in your walk right now, but wen the emptiness of darkness covers your spiritual life, remember these words.
Many times the tests God gives us are not only for us. God uses them to get the attention of those around us too...
.... 2 more pages on that sentence that I won't go into, though still relevant. I have always said that because of trials, I'm just becoming more relate-able :) and that I know God is going to use these for myself and if not for myself, for others.
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I won't even reflect on that. But that's it.
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